Many couples aren’t willing to save their marriages, which is part of the reason the divorce rate is so high. A lot of effort is usually required to save a marriage from divorce, so you and your significant other must be willing to put in the work. There are no overnight miracles, but if you put in the time and hard work, you can save your marriage.
Of course, your spouse must be willing to work hard as well. The very first step is for you both to recognize your own faults, and to work on improving them. Individually, you and your partner should admit to your own faults.
Once you’ve done that, here are some more steps you can take:
• Try to be more tolerant toward each other. If, for example, you feel your significant other is over-critical, ask him or her to be less so. Both of you should be willing to make these changes. Try to avoid arguing over things that don’t matter, like snoring, too much time in the bathroom, loud music, etc.
• If you cheated on your partner, find out what you need to do to regain trust. Likewise, if your significant other cheated on you, be clear with what you want. Both of you should be open about what is expected to earn forgiveness.
• If you suspect that your husband/wife is cheating on you, wait until you’re absolutely certain before confrontation. There are many ways to catch a cheating lover, but be certain you are right. Avoid methods that might be unethical like hidden surveillance. If you are caught snooping, have good reason to be doing so.
• Try thinking rationally. Even if you’re devastated over your lover’s cheating, you should still try to think logically. Write a letter to your partner if you continually lose your temper when talking.
• Find an expert. Although friends and family can offer some advice, they’re not professionals. They will only tell you what they would do if they were in your situation, not necessarily what would be best for you. Encourage your spouse to visit a counselor.
• Rather than sit in the house getting on one another’s nerves, suggest something different like a movie. How about a short, romantic vacation together? Start all over and visit the same places you visited when you first fell in love. Think about the things that made your significant other fall in love with you and do them again.
• Include your husband/wife in the loop. This works well if you’ve been accused of neglecting your partner. Partners should share the decision-making process.
• When making decisions, it’s okay to argue, just as long as you don’t take the argument too far. Explain why you want to do something without arguing. Inform your spouse of your opinion without coming off as condescending. Both of you should act like adults!
The key to a lasting marriage is openness and respect. Respect your differences and be open with your husband/wife. These ideas can help you stop a break up and be able to say I was able to stop my divorce!
Posted on December 29th, 2010 by authorgen
Filed under: Self Improvement